First Love

First love... You may either not believe in love/"love", or is a hardcore lover; whatever the case maybe, one thing is true for sure that everyone has experienced their first love, however short that feeling lasted.

And like any other normal "human being" ( *trying not to disclose my identity* ), I have also  experience my fair share of the first love and it's pangs.

I was 8/9 years old and decided that I'm old enough to get my own room and not sleep with my parents anymore which to my delight my parents agreed to.

Real reason being me wanting to watch cartoons even after 9 PM, but that's a different story for another time... maybe.

So I get my own room, I have my wardrobe and my study table... NGL I felt very adulty then. It was summer, things were heating up not just outside but inside me too. That's when I first saw him.
He was just beautiful. Big amber eyes, and soft silvery hair. Top it off with ballet??? Like dude how can you be any more dreamy??? Ok Ok, yes it was a fictional character... Yes... I know... But my FEELINGS were REAL okay??!!! Good.

(Anime is Princess Tutu do check it out if you wish)

I related myself to Princess Tutu alot, I felt ugly in my own body. Apparently I had larger frame than my peers so they would tease me and called me fat. I didn't feel pretty enough, not white enough, not slim enough... See that's what society does and I was 8 y/o for Pete's sake ... Okay getting side tracked.

Sooooo *spoiler alert* ... Whenever she transformed into that beautiful swan and save Prince Siegfried ( my first love UwU )
I felt powerful and happy. I was rooting for them and secretly for us!!!!

Prince was kind but emotionless as his heart pieces were shattered (that's the plot), but he learns to understand emotions and feel them too. It was a beautiful story. I remember acting like I slept, just so that I could watch the episodes which aired at 10 PM. I felt guilty lying to my parents but yeahhh...

I experienced my heart beating fast when HE was on screen, And after episode was over I could not think of anything else but him. It was crazy. Everyday I looked forward to 10 PM. It was like the holy time. And when the last episode aired. If you listened close enough you woul have heard something break ... My heart 💔

I would never see him again, he didn't even end up with Princess Tutu. Not the ending I expected. It was all heartbreaking. I cried whole night silently. I was like in post break up emotion for a week.

I never knew what I experienced was a "crush". It was only later when I grew up and learned about the world that I realized Mytho has been my first crush all along.

The End to my crappy first crush story. BTW this is a story that I usually tell to people to break the ice ❄️